Howdy!
I hope all is great in your world, and if I haven’t already told you this: Happy New Year!
Typically the new year means change for many people, and we all have many goals/resolutions/plans; whatever you want to call them, but common goals are: change career path, start a business, and to build better relationships. For this reason is why we’re going to talk about people skills.
Having good people skills I consider an asset because just about everything you do in life involves people. Proper people skills can help you land jobs quicker, establish important relationships that could catapult your career, communicate your ideas effectively, diffuse tension with others, and help you sell more of whatever it is you sell!
I’m going to take the three principles we will be covering from a phenomenal must read book. I have read at least 15 times. How to win friends & influence people.
Principle 1: Become genuinely interested in other people.
What does this mean? The same way a newborn demands attention is the same manner most adults act: we crave attention and are innately selfish. I like to call it the me effect. Typically people are more interested in their own world and matters than they are of your personal situations. This is not a bad thing necessarily; you just have to know how to use it to your advantage.
So, here is the situation: the next time you are speaking with someone new or even a common acquaintance, ask them, How are you doing, What have you been up to these days, How’s life in your world, How’s your business going? Your goal to genuinely listen to the person, and ask questions about the responses they give you. Act as if this individual is the only person in the world, and they are the only person that matters at that moment.
When you employ that type of interest in people, you will start to attract people to you. They will not know what it is but there’s something about [your name] that I like they will say. This simple yet powerful technique develops reciprocity, and people will literally go to extreme lengths to help you whenever you need ANYTHING! This technique works, but you have to be genuinely authentic using this.
Principle 2: Smile
You’ll be surprised how wearing a smile on your face can change the whole countenance of a person and light up a room; a simple smile can brighten up someone’s day just by you smiling. Just picture a little child smiling at you, how does that make you feel? Too many adults walk around like the world is about to end, but you’ll be surprised how a simple smile can change their mood instantly. Furthermore, smiling will make you feel better and improve your day; it’s along the same question do you sing because your happy or are you happy because you sing?…if you’re in a blah mood, just start smiling, and start to see your mood improve!
Experiment: I want you to smile at 5 people either today or tomorrow. Take a mental note on how many of the 5 people you smiled at did not smile back. Can I give you a hint? I will venture to say at least 4 out of the 5 people will smile back at you. People want to be happy; you just have to give them a reason to be happy!
Principle 3: Remember that a person’s name is to that person the sweetest & most important sound than any language.
Your name is YOUR name for a reason, and its important people call you by YOUR name. Your name is what you’re known by since a wee little lad, and you have ownership to your name it’s yours!
One of the quickest ways to slowly lose comradery with people is to call them outside of their names meaning giving them nicknames you think is cool, shortening their name and not pronouncing it fully. If Nathan likes to be called Nathan, don’t call him Nate. If he likes to be called Nate and not Nathan, don’t call him Nathan. Having the decency and respect to call people what they prefer is a super-quick way to build great relationships with people. Showing this simple respect goes a LONG way.
Ok, that’s all for now, more on people skills later. Today we learned the importance of being genuinely interested people as a means to developing great relationships. We learned how smiling can brighten someone’s day plus your own! We also learned the quickest way to tarnish relationships-calling people anything other than their name. If you commit to following these three principles, I can assuredly tell you, your relationships and friend count will dramatically increase! Till’ the next time friend, keep on keeping on and remember your best is yet to come! Peace.
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